Before I talk about her, let's lead up to it.
Logistics aside, I had a major internal conflict. When you're ready to give birth to your second child..... not the time to have second thoughts. :-P
Would I be able to love them both? Would Norah still feel special? Would I be able to "do it all" with an extra kid around taking up what was left of my free-time and sanity? Would I be able to meet their needs?
One night, in a hospital room by myself (high blood pressure... non responsive NST... blah blah blah), I realized: No, I can't. But with God's help, I can. I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength. Philippians 4:13. I can't do it all, and no one expects me to. I can, however, give it to Him and trust that everyine will be taken care of. I give my best and let Him do the rest.
And ya know what? It worked.
Two months later, I can look back and smile when I think of my insecurities. Norah has surpassed all of my expectations. She genuniely loves "her baby." When she gets home from school, she immediately wants to know where Madeline is. When she wakes up in the morning, "Hi baby sister! Did you have a good sleep?" She wants to help me do evvvvvverything. She's been incredible, really. People often ask how Norah handles it... and it sounds so silly, or like I'm making it up, but she truly has done incredibly well. I can't really say it any other way.
Quickie Birth Story
My pregnancy was wonderful until late October - early November. My blood pressure slowly started to creep up and a series of non-responsive non-stress tests (NST) sent me to the hospital for further monitoring on more than one occasion. Exhausting, frustrating, but I'm thankful for doctors who were operating under the "better safe than sorry" mindset. The nurses at LPH were all fabulous and so sweet.
My due date was originally December 13th.... one day before Norah's birthday. Ha.
My scheduled C-section was to be on December 8th.... then December 1st... and ultimately on November 24th. They saw no real reason to keep me pregnant when the baby looked good and everything seemed okay.
We arrived early on Monday, November 24th. I got hooked up to an IV, was administered liquids, given that nasty little orange cup of gunk to drink before c-section, my blood pressure was taken more times than I care to remember, and I was wheeled to the OR around 8am.
I tried really hard to be aware and take it all in. I watched the OR staff scurry around to gather what they needed. I listened as they counted their instruments. I was FREEZING cold. (If you know me, I expect that you chuckled just now...) Everyone was talking to me in calm tones and reassuring me that we were going to have a great delivery.
My anesthesiologist got me prepped for a spinal block. I remember the sensation shooting down my leg, then they readjusted and got it in the right place and asked me to lie down quickly. I was totally calm this time. Doctors Ketchum and Turano come in to say hi. Shawn comes in. It's go-time.
Lots of pulling and tugging later (Dr. Turano even asked for a step stool to help push the baby out.... soreness would follow for the next several days... wowza), I heard the tiniest little cry. "Hi little peanut!" Dr. Turano called out. "She's a girl!" She was here!
The nurses wrapped her up and brought her around to me. One of them said, "I think mommy should always get the first kiss." And I did. She was slimy and gross, but she was here.. and she was perfect!
Sewn back together and groggy, I spent the next couple of hours in recovery. They had issue stabilizing my blood pressure. Finally, it was back to my room to visit with family and hold this sweet new baby. She was 5lb 10oz and 18.5inches long. It's funny how all of the fears just went out the window from the first time I heard her cry.
Norah met her with a little reservation; I think a lot of it came because she had an audience. When it was just a few of us (aw, Wade Party of 4), she warmed right up. She wanted to help feed her, she wanted to hold her...it was a really sweet time.
We spent 2 days in the hospital and went home on Wednesday before Thanksgiving. My recovery was SO MUCH BETTER than the first go-around. I can't explain it. I felt better. I moved easier. I was up walking as soon as my numbness wore off. It was just a world of difference.
I had plenty of help with Norah in the first several days. My sweet church family provided us with meals and company.
She's here, now two-months old (yes, it's taken me THAT long to get this typed.. ha). I'm a mom of two. It's better than I imagined. :) We're blessed!
